a day about her
2003-02-23 at 1:11 a.m.

she remembered having breakfast wif livi, josh n gab.she ate mr soya bean for the 1st time.

she was irritated by the fact tt people keep saying she looks like pam, cos she's she and her sis's her sis.

she felt so insignificant.

then she went for pm n wfl, standard.

she picked her fren mun up, n 2 of her frens, joyce n cat were late.

she laughs at the the mvp video but she prefers the part 1 when cassian came out as gao xing.

she was quite blur when her frens left.

at dinner, three of them went for clm, while the rest of them were still eating.

she was the only girl around so she didn't want to hang around.

she wanted to find her best fren Niza but she msged that she was not working tt nite.

she wanted to take bus 7 home but she didn't wan to go home so early.

so she accompanied gab to take e mrt.

gab wanted to take to marina bay and all the way to amk.

she said she wanted to follow him but alight at raffles place.

in the end gab held on to her bag n said tt she'll probably commit suicide at the mrt track.

she reluctantly stayed.

all the while gab kept saying that she was sad,upset,watever.

she totally denied and asked him for proof. gab said that her actions, the way she acted n spoke, and even her face betrayed her.

actually, she was feeling very fine until gab keep repeating till she became pek chek.

den her him called her and told her he's going pubbing.

it was the part she really felt like crying.

sometimes she felt that they're different.

gab kept saying that her laugh was fake, and she didn't look at all happy, and when she was not happy she would laugh hysterically or behave wierdly. gab even said if she wasn't sad, why did she want to find her fren?

before gab left he said," seee wanna cry also no tears, so pathetic"

duh, she had no tears because she had nothing to cry for..

he said that she could bluff others but not herself.

ok whatever she thought, she took the whole north line back home, but den the crazy thing she did was she sat at bukit batok mrt platform for one hour plus, and she took out a paper to write out all this.

she would transfer all this to her online diary when she got home.. and she was still on the platform at 10pm.

she decided to board the next train to jurong east.. and she missed.. unknown number of trains.

she realised that the world does not change juz becos of how u feel.

she saw alot of diff pple getting in n out of the train and they think she's mad juz sitting there writing.

she decided to walk the long way home. she reached her stop n the ezlink card exceeded the time limit.

she went to 7-11 and almost bought vodka, but thinkin of her $$ she bought some shit drink.

she walked round n round the whole neighbourhood.

she took the long way home and even when she reached her block, she crossed over and took a big round.

she cannot remember the time she reached home.

she went home.. typed her diary.

and she does not know what she's going to do next...

she juz feels she misses someone..